Summer Recommendations for Moms Who Write

ABOUT THE EPISODE

Recently, I've realized that the thing that I enjoy doing or providing for others is sharing what I know or what I've learned. This is the closest thing I have to a superpower – I love to research and find information, especially information that isn't well known to the general public and share it with others. In the spirit of that, I decided that I wanted to do a special content recommendation episode, which is really a summer send off because I'll be taking a little over a month off to give myself a break and focus some of my energy on a few other projects in the works with Motherscope. I also really want to give myself some time to think about how I want to return and show up for this podcast and for you. So enjoy this episode where I’m sharing everything from what you should read and watch this summer to a bit of media literacy and summer to-do’s for you!

 
 

TOPICS DISCUSSED

  • Everything that goes into writing beyond putting words down on the page 

  • Why Jackie recommends re-reading a book that you loved as a child during the slowness of summer 

  • The way that Abbott Elementary highlights the real experiences of teachers, especially those in low income communities and why you should watch it 

  • A list of to-do’s for every writer this summer, especially those who are mothers 

  • The importance of media literacy as a writer and mother

  • The way media commodifies the bodies of women and mothers, and how that is a direct threat to our safety

  • Why Jackie decided to not release an episode covering the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial 

  • The physicality of motherhood, feeling touched out, and how this affects our mental health and relationships 

  • Jackie shares some fun viral videos you’ve got to check out as a palate cleanse after the heavy content earlier in the episode


RESOURCES MENTIONED

  • Jackie Leonard 00:00

    There are some people I know who have been able to identify what they call their superpower. And to be honest, I'm a little envious and admire at the same time, the ability to have that competence and that certainty about what it is about them that is special and that they need to share with the world. I still struggle with with naming that. But recently, I've realized that the thing that I enjoy doing or providing for others is sharing what I know or what I've learned, I love to research and find information, especially information that isn't well known to the general public and share it with others either with like a, that could be a book recommendation, it can be some facts, some weird trivia, in pop culture, it really kind of runs the gamut. But that's the closest thing I can can reach or arrive to when I think of a quote unquote, superpower or what it means to me anyway. Which is really just the thing that that we feel the most uniquely qualified to share with the world. And in the spirit of that, I decided that I wanted to do a special episode, which is really a summer send off, because I'll be taking a little over a month off to obviously give myself a break, and then also focus some of my energy on a few other projects in the works from other scope, and really give myself some time to think about how I want to return and show up for this podcast. So I decided to change up the programming and push it back until we return. And instead have this episode where I feel like I'm giving you some some things sharing some things I've found recommending some things for you listening as my summer send off, so let's get to it. So if you're a regular listener, the format of this episode is a little different than typical formats, which I mean, let's be honest, for season two, it's

    Jackie Leonard 02:07

    been a little bit open ended, and freeform. But for this episode, I have broken it down with recommendations across all kinds of mediums, reading, watching writing, media literacy, and appellate cleanse, you may know that I host a writing community that supports moms who want to write for whatever reason, they feel called to write. And I've realized a lot through that community and showing up every week via zoom. And, you know, focusing on writing in different ways that writing itself is more than just the act of sitting down and writing. And even I myself right now I am in a season of realizing that the things that I engage with the activities I've been doing that the stuff I've been watching and listening to has enriched my writing. And that's because in the past month, I've been a lot more intentional with what I consume. I'd say like in the months prior to that I was very unintentional, or just kind of going where I felt pulled, and not really thinking about it or paying attention to how it influenced me. And just like I said in the last few weeks, really because I'm only in the second or third week of July. Right now as I'm recording. I've noticed that reading something that I felt really compelled to and call to read, watching a few things that were really thought provoking, limiting the amount of you know, news or social media that I engage with, has all helped my writing for the better. And I'm at a point right now where I'm writing things that I'm coming up with that I with ideas that are kind of overflowing to the point where I'm having to this week, I've set aside some time to really plot out what exactly it is that I want to do what I want to spend time with. So my ideas don't get shelved too early. And that really is part of the reason why I've decided to take a break with the podcast because I want to be able to give my full energy to some of the other things that are brewing for me and others scope and also so that when I do return to the podcast, I'm charged up for that. So all that to say all of these recommendations I feel very intentionally have been created to give you a summer experience that feels stimulating and thought provoking and inspirational and playful. So in I'd say the past year or two I've learned to appreciate all seasons for you know their uniqueness and the things they offer but I will say summertime has For a while been my favorite season. And when I think of the summer I think of youth, I think of play and fun. It's really built into our culture. I don't know if it's like westernized culture or capitalism or whatnot. But we are conditioned to look at the summer as the time when we take time off. When we go on vacation, it's the time when school is out. And so very naturally, it feels childlike and youthful to do all those things. Right. That was the time in our lives when we got a break. And as adults, we've been conditioned to imitate that as well and continue that trend. Obviously, the the weather and the season has something to do with it. Right. It's the time of year when it is warm and, and sunny, the days are longer all of that. So when I think about reading what I was trying to come up with a book or two to recommend for you to read this summer, obviously, I have a pile of books that I could cite, there's Busy Books that are really getting a lot of press and attention right now. But to go back to the summertime being a time of youthfulness, this has me thinking about the books that I read as a child. And so for my recommendation for reading this summer, if you're not already invested in a book right now, like I'd say, like halfway through, or like really into a book that you've just started, I recommend trying to reread a book or two that you loved as a child. And reading it just for yourself, not a book that you pull out in are like, Oh, I'm gonna read this with my kids. And of course, if you want to read it with your kids, I'm not stopping you. But I like the idea and the practice of pulling out a book that you read as a child and reading it during your adult quiet time, the time that you have away from your children or the early morning, the end of the day, that kind of reading experience. And for me the two books that popped out that I feel drawn to the summer, our de Laurie's book of Greek myths. And that's a book that I first was exposed to in like fourth grade, we had a senior volunteer come and read some stories. And that was the book that that he brought. And I really don't remember the full timeline of how this happened. But he at the end gifted me the book,

    Jackie Leonard 07:29

    I must have shown like a lot of interest or something because he he gifted me that that the book of Preakness when he was finished with his assignment with our class, and I must have misplaced it or it got destroyed over the years. And back in 2012, I went to a bookstore in Berkeley, and came across the book again and had to buy it. And that is the book that I have now, the only reason I know that that's the year and place that I bought this book was because I just opened it up and I found the receipt to that bookstore. And that's noteworthy to me because I've been really drawn to that that time period. 2012 was when I was in grad school, or the middle of grad school. And I'm actually in the middle of working on a writing project that I first started in grad school that I had put down for 10 years. So it all feels very aligned that I just picked up this book to recommend to you all and I found this receipt. So there is something really special about returning to an old book an old period of our lives and revisiting what we were entertained by. And so, in the spirit of nostalgia, I've been bringing up nostalgia a lot this season with television shows and movies, but our reading experiences can also be nostalgic. So that's a book that I look forward to cracking open and reading a few stories from the second book that also reminds me of my childhood and summer. I believe it's set primarily in the summertime actually, is Sharon creatures, absolutely normal chaos. It's a young adults fiction book. And I believe the protagonist is a preteen or, you know, middle school aged writing about the summertime and to tie in with the Greek mythology. She has to read the Odyssey over the summer. And so that kind of is weaved through her journal entries to our teacher as part of a summer assignment. And it's just a book that I just think back to and remember reading for the first time and really getting sucked into and this book is not one that I was assigned to read. It's not one that I remember being recommended. It was just one I must have grabbed and read and I think I read it once or twice afterwards again, because it was it was such an enjoyable read. So I look forward to pushing myself to to read those books a little bit this summer as a nod to my youth, and I recommend that you do the same with whatever books came to mind as I've been talking about my two childhood books. So for your viewing recommendations, I feel like so much of the season has been talking about movies and TV that I don't want to go too much into this but something that I just started watching myself for the first time and I've really enjoyed and wanted to recommend and encourage you to check out as well is the show Abbott Elementary. This is an ABC show created by Quinta Branson. This show is a mockumentary style sitcom, and Brunson plays a second grade teacher at Al Abbott Elementary, a fictional black school in Philadelphia.

    Jackie Leonard 10:50

    And the premise of the show is that a documentary crew is recording the lives of teachers working in underfunded schools. One of the places they have decided to document is Philadelphia's Willard R. Abbott Elementary School, a predominantly black Philadelphia public school conditions at the school are harsh, and most teachers do not last more than two years. So this show recently received a number of Emmy nominations, and has been a very busy show. I believe the second season is due out this fall. So I'm now in the process of going through the first season. But I've always found it interesting that a number of people in the mother scope community, our teachers are former teachers. And so I wanted to put this on your radar if you haven't watched it already, because it is so validating and also illuminating to watch a show that really centers the teachers experiences, especially in marginalized communities. I was a teacher for a number of years before becoming a parents. And most of my teaching was done at a charter school in South Los Angeles. So a lot of the challenges that are highlighted at the school, feel very spot on. And I really appreciate that a show about the teacher experiences is so popular right now, I remember being a teacher and because I'm somebody who watches a lot of TV and movies thinking to myself that I've never really seen on the screen, the experience that I was having as a teacher played out in a realistic way. And I also felt like there was so much that was like really funny and absurd that you could layer with the real social inequities that I was a firsthand witness to as a teacher, in the Compton Watts area. And also, just like the simplicity to of working with teenagers, I think that a lot of times I would tell people where I worked, and they'd be like, Oh my gosh, like, how did you do it, or I must have been so this and that. And a lot of it just like boiled down to very universal challenges that a lot of teachers experience and a lot of students and teenagers are experiencing. So the nuance of sort of the harsh realities of school conditions in historically disenfranchised settings, weaving in the humor of it. And just the real worlds day to day life of teachers in a school community, I think needed to be handled carefully and with intention. And so far, from what I've seen of the show, it really does, especially for network show. So that's my watch recommendation. And it's kind of nice to watch it over the summer so that if you really enjoy it, you're ready to watch it the next season in the fall.

    Jackie Leonard 13:48

    So I couldn't do an episode on recommendations without talking about writing. And I have two writing recommendations for you for the summer specifically, but I think within reason you could probably exercise these recommendations throughout the year. My first is to go on an artist's date. If you're not familiar, this phrase or this exercise is from Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way I'm pretty sure she's the one that coins you know the term artists date. But if not, that's how I'm familiar with it. And essentially, the concept is to go out of your home and do something by yourself that feels like a treats is new stimulating as a way to kind of inspire or awaken your creativity. To give you an example of what this looks like the other day, I got out of the house by myself and went to a local bookstore and just spent an hour wandering around the aisles and I had a couple of books in mind that I wanted to get but for the most part I just kind of went to go and I love bookstores, I'm sure a lot of you who are here probably have a similar attitude about bookstores and libraries. But I just love wandering the aisles. To go back to talking about the youth in the summer time, spending time in bookstores, does take me back to my childhood and, and just the ability to sit down and crack open a book and read it for a few minutes and look at covers. And all of that is really peaceful for me. So I went and did that. And I picked out a stack of books, most of which were ones that I discovered while I was there, which is really fun. And that was what I did. But an artist's date doesn't have to cost you money. It's really about just taking yourself somewhere that feels special or like a treat, that's just for you. And giving yourself at least like an hour or more to, to explore. And I think this is something that Julia Cameron mentions and recommends herself. And I would cosign that as well. But I,

    Jackie Leonard 16:08

    I really encourage you, if you do an artist date, try to go somewhere that's new, because there's something about being somewhere for the first time going to a new restaurants trying a new park, walking through a new bookstore that you haven't been to before that, that just brings the extra specialness to be experienced, then going somewhere that you're already familiar with. Obviously, maybe it's harder to do over time, because you're going to run out of places to go. But bringing in some level of new to the experience heightens it in a way. So that's my challenge to you as for the rest of the summer, or whatever season you're in and you're listening to this episode, find some time to go out on an artist date, even just like a half hour an hour away somewhere new, special to you can do wonders. And my second writing recommendation is to spend some time riding outside. This can look all kinds of ways it doesn't have to be a serious outing, driving, you know, a half hour away or going on a long walk. It can be as simple as if you have a balcony sitting outside on your balcony can be sitting outside on your doorstep, taking a walk around the block and finding a place to sit and write going to a park. It can be anything that works for you. But there is something special about getting outdoors and finding a way to just sit and journal or doodle brainstorm or write for an extended amount of time. And depending on where you live, this isn't something that is always accessible. For most people listening, especially those of us that are in the United States. This is the time of year when the sun is out the most and the weather is warm. It might be too hot right now for for you to be out there in the middle of the day for some people. But this is the time of year that you can really indulge and get outside and enjoy the sun and the longer days and be outdoors and writes. We can't do that when it's raining throughout the day or it's snowing as easily. So I want to encourage that. And just it's this is all experimental. Everything that I've shared, you know, some of the things that you do might not be that exciting if you try them out. But the act of experimenting and trying new things, and just seeing what it feels like does feel really playful. And that's what I'm trying to bring out for for all of us during the summertime especially.

    Jackie Leonard 18:54

    I touched on this earlier, but I am exploring ways to strengthen each podcast episode moving forward. And I feel like I'm coming to a little bit of a natural end to Season Two soon. So I've been thinking about its natural evolution, if that looks like a new season at that looks like a condensed version of seasons one and two, a springboard like I'm really in an experimental phase with the podcast as well. And recently, I came across the term media literacy. And I really liked that as a way to describe what I've been actively trying to do with season two, which is really shine a light on the media that we consume, the entertainment that we take in the pop culture that we read about and are exposed to so that we know where it's coming from who aren't who are the people that are driving these stories. Why are we seeing these specific images and sound bites all across our social media, you know, all those things can be really influential, even if we don't realize it. And so this season, I've been wanting to shine a light on that, especially with regard to how motherhood is represented. But it goes a lot further than just motherhood, as we know, and motherhood is very much and everything I think, you know, you could talk about education, sports, health, and medicine, our professional careers, like all of those things, when I say them out loud, I can easily connect them to motherhood. So very quickly, anything that I talked about, with the lens of motherhood, can absolutely be related to motherhood, and this podcast. So I wanted to have this episode also include some some readings on a variety of subject matter and topics that are current in our online publications. And in the media, I would say the common thread of all four that I'm going to share with you are really the commodification of women's bodies, and personal safety. And all this reading is heavy on the heavier scale, like it's, you're gonna read a lot of this and get upset, feel frustrated, angry. And that's why I balanced it out with some lighter content earlier. But I do think Summertime is also synonymous with heat, and passion. And also violence. I mean, I believe I don't have the data in front of me right now. But the summertime is, at least in the United States, the time when murders and violent crimes go up historically. So I felt like I couldn't quite gloss over the season of the summer, without acknowledging that there's, you know, good and bad revealed in the summertime. So the first reading that I wanted to share with you all is it's really a Twitter thread, but it links to a report titled targeted trolling and trend manipulation, how organized attacks on Amber Heard and other women thrive on Twitter. There actually exists a last episode that I recorded back in May that talked about the Johnny Depp and Amber, her trial, I felt really compelled at the time to speak about victims of domestic abuse, power dynamics Darboe, Davao and also like free speech and the freedom to speak out against people who harm us. But shortly after I recorded it, the verdict came out. And that didn't influence my opinion on the matter. But I self assessed after the fact and realize that I did not have it in me to have a debate about the marriage or you know who did what, because to me that that didn't really matter. That wasn't really the whole point of of what I wanted to get across. But I knew that that would get really lost or bogged down in the sensationalism and reactions that I was seeing as a result of the trial. So I just knew from my own mental health that I didn't want to engage with that. And I knew that creating an episode that was specifically about it would invite that potentially. But I'm also a stubborn person. And I do feel like it is still something that I'm I'm exposed to and seeing a lot especially on Twitter and other social media sites. I'm seeing hashtags against the Ember heard that seem to be just out of nowhere.

    Jackie Leonard 23:55

    There's a podcast that I listened to that made a comment recently because they briefly referenced the trial and ever since they said that every post they do on social media now has like really random comments about Amber Heard that our pro Johnny Depp that just seemed really unhinged and out there and they they said they, like have never seen any kind of commentary on another celebrity or person that they've commented on, like this. And so when I saw this documented report of an investigation into the accounts and the hashtags that have been created, against Amber Heard and in support of Johnny Depp, I, I wanted to share it with you guys just as a way to see the way that Amber Heard and her supporters were subjected to just like random harassment in a way that It's, it's so far from justified and I've had some people say to me like, oh, I don't even pay attention to that. I don't care about it just to like dumb celebrities. But it really alongside all of the other attacks on women we've seen in just a matter of weeks, feels like it will reverberate and have long lasting consequences that illuminate a much larger systemic problem. And to me that problem is not male victims of abuse at the hands of their wives. So I'll have that linked in the show notes. The other reading I wanted to recommend is titled they will never believe us by Jessica Valenti. This is an essay that Jessica published on her substack but it is available to read as a visitor, the the full essays title actually, as they will never believe us with the byline not even if we're 10 years old. And if you're not familiar, Jessica is referencing the story of the 10 year old girl in Ohio, who had been raped and impregnated and had to travel across state lines to receive an abortion. And after the headline, you know, the story came out in the news about this Ohio girl, some conservative media sites started to question the validity Validity of the story, which has since been dis disputed and proven wrong, but Jessica's essay really highlights and calls, calls out the fact that even the story of a 10 year old who has been abused and disenfranchised, is still not believed, is still something that, you know, will will get shrugged off as a rumor or a hoax by the media. The Washington Post, I believe was the first that that put out a an op ed that basically said that the story of the Ohio girl who had to cross state lines to get an abortion was quote too good to confirm. And despite the fact that we know that only 5% of rapes result in arrest, the columnist for this, this op ed basically said that the story would have had more solid grounding if the rape was confirmed by law enforcement or if someone was charged. And honestly, since since this essay was even written, There has continued to be pushback about whether or not a 10 year old could even get pregnant and questioning that. It's I mean, it's as infuriating as you can imagine if you go down the rabbit hole and read what people are saying that want to shut down this story. But for that reason, and more, I do appreciate how well Jessica Valenti lays out how this case in particular is an example of the larger truth, which is that women are not believed. Whether they are a child, or an adult, whether they have a mountain of evidence and physical proof of an abuse, they still will be questioned and not believed. And I do think that does connect to the earlier dialogue around the Ember her Johnny Depp trial.

    Jackie Leonard 28:26

    The third reading that I recommend highly that you check out this summer is the essay how American moms got touched out by Amanda mentaI, published in Slate. And this I'll just encourage you to read but what I really appreciate it and what made this reading really feel affirming and new was the way that Amanda talks about the physicality of motherhood, how much of our bodies we give to motherhood in ways that are not acknowledged enough. I remember talking with my therapist actually about feeling touched out and using that phrase, and she was not familiar with it. And I just remember being like really like this is very much a thing and it's something that very much affects my mental state. It affects my moods. It plays into a lot of how I'm able to feel safe in my body and I navigate that a lot as a parent obviously because I want to be close with my children but at the beginning of the essay Amanda references a tech talk or who says that she used to be a hugger and after having children, her husband's attempts to give her a hug. Now she repels and I know I'm sure that so many of you listening can relate to this feeling just this feeling of having to give so much of our bodies to being mothers and this essay I saw value and really learned a lot from was just the the evolution really of how it's reached this like critical breaking point for moms. She talks about popular parenting advice from back in the 90s. She references her upbringing around setting boundaries and her body as a young girl. There's this really great quote, when she says, As a girl in the 90s and early 2000s, I had never learned to say no to unwelcome physical touch. And again, even even though what she's saying American moms are touched out is not a surprise to any American mom, any mom really out there. But the way that she's able to connect the way she was taught to or not taught about her own body and our own physical space, the way that parenting ideologies and the ways that we've learned about the psychology of children, in recent years has influenced our anxiety around giving enough to our children giving more of ourselves to our children than is what's actually healthy for us, relates to the commodification, again of of women's bodies and the bodies of mothers pressure to self sacrifice in different ways. What's also really cool about this essay is she weaves in social media commentary from moms and bloggers and all that alongside scientific data, sociology, psychology, current events, politics, it's all so well done. And what I also very much appreciate is that even though she's talking about us feeling touched out and her own personal relationship with, you know, being frustrated with the amount of touch and and physicality of motherhood, she still talks about the pleasures of motherhood and the fact that she does really love to cuddle and snuggle with her daughter. And those two truths. And many truths are not mutually exclusive. So what she's really speaking to is body autonomy and consent in a way that has never really been explored and taken seriously from the perspective and care of a mother in past generations. And the last reading is an op ed, that was written by Roxane Gay, who's one of my favorite essays out there now. Titled Brittney Griner is trapped and alone. Where's your outrage? This is published in the New York Times on July 15. And details. The Brittney Griner trial that is going on in Russia currently, if you're not familiar, Brittney Griner is a WNBA star. She's

    Jackie Leonard 33:15

    an Olympic gold medalist who has been detained in Russia for months now. Allegedly because she was found to be in possession of I believe, discarded vape pens at a Russian Airport. This is another case where a lot of some of the nuance of the details of her arrest don't really matter. And it's more really about the fact that she was detained in Russia. Why was she in Russia? She was there to play during the summer, which has brought up rightfully so a lot of arguments around like why did she a gold medalist, a WNBA star have to go to Russia to play during the summer? It's because you look at their the salaries of WNBA stars versus NBA stars, and they're just a fraction of what somebody of her caliber would be paid in the NBA. But what is really powerful about this essay by Roxane Gay is really, you know, just highlighting she she really calls to question why this case why Britney grinders story is not receiving the mass media attention and anger, outrage and action that you would expect of an American decorated athlete being held hostage essentially in Russia. And she asks, Is it misogyny, racism, homophobia, the unholy trifecta, so I just I encourage you to read this to not only understand Under the situation at hand, but to take now in relation with the other readings that I've laid out the ways in which, to quote, Roxane Gay, humanity is erased, especially when it comes to the humanity of the women, the mothers, the queer, who are all in our own ways at the mercy of misogyny and white supremacy in our country and beyond. So I warned you ahead of time that the readings that I was going to provide for this Medius literacy course, if you will, for the summer was heavy was enraging. But I do feel like again, they all share a very unfortunate common thread that women's bodies, the bodies of people with uteruses are under threat, and are not safe. That this is not new. But it is something that isn't new. This has been true historically. But we are at a critical time in history where in some ways, things are going backward. And that's not something that we want to sort of dole out and numb out and not pay attention to. So I did say that I would provide some palate cleanse at the end of this episode. And I, every time I pull up this, this little video, it just brings a smile to my face, it makes me laugh, it's, of course, thanks to an animal but there is a co star in the video that that does get some credit for just the humor and the the natural just hilarity of what happens when humans and animals come together. And so I recommend you watch this video whenever you want. But if you're you know after you've read some really heavy material or had a bad day, just go check out at knuckle bump farms on tick tock or Instagram. I'll link the video that went viral and is how they got on my radar. But it is the one that brought a smile to my face. And I won't say anymore, but I hope that it's an appropriate palate cleanse to the heaviness that is out there right now. And I also want to recap and remind you to find something to read the summer that reminds you of your youth a book that you read as a child that you enjoyed and loved. Take some time to do that

    Jackie Leonard 37:52

    this summer. Check out the TV show Abbott elementary for some new viewing if you haven't seen it yet, go on an artists date. Take yourself out somewhere that feels special just you by yourself and also make some time to write in the outdoors during the summertime before the days get shorter and colder. I will be linking all four essays that I recommend reading that offer commentary on women's bodies and motherhood and the ways that both are under threat. And don't forget to enjoy your palate cleanse, courtesy of knuckle bump farms. So that is it for this episode and I am signing off for the summer or the rest of the summer at least. During the break, I encourage you to check out past episodes you may not have listened to especially if you're a new listener. And if you're enjoying the podcast, please leave me a written review on Apple podcasts. Those reviews really go a long way to attracting new listeners and growing this podcast throughout the summer on mother's scope.com and our online journal and also publishing stories and poetry by our 30 Plus contributors from all over the world moms who are raising their children of varying ages and walks of life. This is another example of content that you can take in that is inspirational and real. And support moms who write just like you. As for when the podcast returns our new episodes resume on September 6. So I will see you then. Bye everyone.

Previous
Previous

Watching Prey with a Mother’s Lens

Next
Next

Teen Drama Mamas on One Tree Hill